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6 Dec

Sexually Fluid: What Does This Even Mean in the Dating World?

If you’ve ever come across someone who’s sexually fluid, you might understand more than the average person. If you haven’t, then you’ve got a lot to learn.

If you’ve been on the internet within the last year, I’m sure you’ve noticed an uproar about sexual orientation. Not just about gay rights, but also about what a large community the LGBT is. Amongst them are those who identify as sexually fluid.

What does sexually fluid mean?

The funny thing about what sexually fluid means is that even the term itself can be quite fluid. Sexually fluid people describe this term as being different depending on how they find it relates the most to them.

I believe The Lala says it best when they refer to being sexually fluid. “In simple terms, sexually fluid refers to the idea that sexual preferences have the capability to change over a lifetime, and in many cases is dependent on different situations.”

Sexually fluid is not bisexual

Many people who don’t understand what sexually fluid means automatically assumes they’re bisexual. While some sexually fluid people may have originally thought they were bisexual, the truth is it’s much different. Sexually fluid people CHANGE their gender preferences sometimes while bisexual people ALWAYS have a preference for both genders.

Just think about someone who is sexually fluid, and their sexual orientation changes like your taste buds. You never used to like mushrooms, but as you’ve aged you developed a liking for them. Sexually fluid is almost the same – except with people.

Sexually fluid people in the dating world

As you can probably imagine, trying to date as a sexually fluid person can have its challenges. You are in a world most people just don’t really understand. In order to dive into the minds of sexually fluid people, this is all you need to know about their dating lives.

#1 Their options are sky high. Sexually fluid people have such a big variety when it comes to people they can date. Man or woman, it doesn’t really matter. Whatever they’re feeling at that moment is whom they can go for.

This allows them to really go for their true feelings, unlimited by gender barriers. Whoever they like could be their next date. And we all know how difficult it can be to find someone that we’re attracted to, let alone that we like.

#2 But also very limited depending on their mood. Being sexually fluid doesn’t mean you’re always going to desire the same type of person all the time. This means their choices are also really limited depending on what they’re feeling.

Sometimes they’ll head out for a night to meet someone great and end up not meeting a single person they’re attracted to. When another time, they would have found loads of people they admire. This can be frustrating for them because they really can’t help that their tastes change.

#3 They can swear off a gender for a certain amount of time without a second thought. If they were recently dating a guy who totally screwed them over and left them so mind-bogglingly heartbroken they couldn’t even manage to eat a single meal without feeling like the world would implode, then they can say “Forget men!” for as long as it takes for them to feel better and get back on their feet.

Sure, people who identify as straight can do this, but then they remain single for that whole time instead of having a great rebound. Sexually fluid people just move onto the next gender with ease.

#4 They’ll have fun witnessing you try to figure out their sexuality. Sexually fluid people really get a kick out of witnessing someone else struggle over what their sexuality really is. They get to laugh at all your guessing games.

Because really, if someone asks a sexually fluid person if they’re straight or gay, “yes,” is a perfectly acceptable answer. That kind of amusement doesn’t come by in a lot of other sexualities.

#5 They can like certain genders depending on the situation. Some people have a higher preference for a certain gender when they’re at the beach than they do skiing. AKA, they’ll find a woman in a bikini to be way hotter than a guy in board shorts.

#6 It’s a tad bit lonely. As much as sexually fluid people have the freedom to date a lot of different people, they feel a bit lonely at times. Maybe not physically lonely, but emotionally lonely because they might find that it’s hard to be themselves.

There are many people out there who just don’t understand sexually fluid people. It can be really lonely trying to hide such a huge part of who they are around people that are openly themselves.

#7 They can run into problems when their new lover doesn’t understand. Dating someone who doesn’t understand or accept sexually fluid people can be heartbreaking. When they date someone new and they uncover their sexuality, their new love interest could have negative feelings about it.

This causes a problem in the relationship and could even end an otherwise awesome thing they’ve got going. Sexually fluid people tend to have more issues around this in a relationship than other people because it’s just so hard to understand.

#8 It can be different for men and women who are sexually fluid. Now, this has been an argument for a long time now. There seems to be a double standard when it comes to the differences between sexually fluid men and women.

Men—on average—are sexually fluid JUST for sex. They don’t see themselves dating another man necessarily, but they entertain the idea of having sex with them. Women, on the other hand, have a more personal connection with the women they date and are in it for more than just the sex—normally.

#9 Finding the right person can be difficult. Since it is so difficult for people to understand—let alone accept—sexually fluid people, it can be a lot harder for people with this sexuality to find someone they’re compatible with.

Dating is really a nightmare of testing out each potential partner based on the premise that they’ll love and accept them for who they are. Something that is not as common as you’d think.

#10 They can have the most fun with dating. Because they don’t have anything that’s stopping them from dating both genders, they get to have the most fun with it. They try picking people up at the bars and almost never go home empty-handed.

This is because they have so many different people they are potentially sexually attracted to. They get to go out and experiment with more people, go on different kinds of dates, and really have fun with who they are.

Gone are the days of not understanding sexually fluid people. Now you know just how their dating life is influenced by their sexuality and what it truly means to be sexually fluid.

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