Fake friendship is not something you should waste your time or heart on. Learn how to tell if your friend is fake and move on quickly!
Not every person in your life will be there for the right reasons. It’s sad! But it’s an unfortunate fact of life. Fake friends have the power to make you miserable, so it’s vital to know how to tell if your friend is fake. Then, work to cut them out of your life.
You don’t need a fake friendship. The chances are that you have many friends in your life who are true, genuine, and want the best for you. A fake friend is likely to come into your life like a whirlwind. They’re likely to want to spend every second with you, making you feel wanted and needed, but there’s something altogether darker behind it. In fact, they’re not friends with you in truth. They just want something from you or use you to make them look good.
How to tell if your friend is fake
It’s harsh. Unfortunately, it’s a sad reality about the human race. Not everyone always has the best intentions. The good news is that you can learn how to tell if your friend is fake by spotting a few tell-tale signs.
You probably already have an inkling. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be reading this and trying to figure out the answers for yourself! In that case, let’s help you put together the clues. Then, you can form an action plan to move on from the whole situation.
#1 You know they talk behind your back. A real friend doesn’t diss you when you’re not around. Instead they always have your back. If you’ve heard that this particular friend has been throwing shade when you’re not around, it’s one of the biggest signs for how to tell if your friend is fake.
It will hurt, that’s a truth. But it’s better to know now than to waste more time on a friendship that really is only for convenience.
#2 For some reason, you just don’t trust them. There’s a lot to be said for gut instinct. If you just have a slight inkling that you really can’t trust this person, listen to it. In the past, you’ve probably told them secrets and felt a little uneasy about what you said afterwards. It’s your gut telling you that there’s something not quite right about this person.
#3 Everything seems one-sided. A fake friend will be selfish and focus on themselves, rather than the friendship itself. Fake friendships are often conditional – i.e. they’re happy while they’re getting what they want and the attention they need. But, if you focus on yourself or spend time with someone else, they’ll quickly turn sour.
#4 You simply can’t be comfortable and feel the need to focus on them all the time. This sign carries on from the last one. In fact, it is one of the biggest ways for how to tell if your friend is fake. If you can’t be comfortable, and you feel like you need to always do something for them or focus your attention on them, it’s because they’re manipulating you and using your good nature for their own needs.
This is something which narcissists often do on the quiet. It’s also something which comes into the fore with a fake friend too. This type of friendship is highly manipulative. It doesn’t fall into the true category of what a friendship should be.
#5 There is always some drama going on. If you look at the friendships you’ve had over the long-term, they were probably pretty stable and easy going. That doesn’t mean they’re boring… it means they’re true.
If this particular friendship is always up and down, full of drama, and this friend is always trying to gossip, it’s a sign you just can’t trust them to be true to you. Evaluate the “friendship” carefully. It’s one of the big aspects to consider.
#6 They’re possessive and don’t like you spending time with others. How does your “friend” react when you talk about your other friends or spend time with them? The chances are that they say something negative about them or pull you back towards them.
A fake friend is possessive. When they’re around your other friends, you’ll notice that they’re just not comfortable. This is simply because they’re worried your real friends are going to see them for what they are – fake.
#7 They lie on a regular basis. Someone who lies regularly can’t be trusted, regardless of whether you call them a friend or not. If you’ve caught this person in a lie more than once, it’s one of the ways to know how to tell if your friend is fake for sure. You need honesty and trust for a friendship to work.
#8 You must always please them. Do you regularly feel under pressure to please this person, to the point where you’re chasing them? For instance, do you text them and they don’t reply for several hours, even though you can see they’re online? This might then make you send more texts.
They do this because it makes them feel needed and wanted, while making you feel undervalued. You do not have to constantly try and please a true friend.
#9 They’re jealous and drag you down to make themselves look or feel good. Do you often feel like this person is dragging you down to make themselves look better? Do they make derogatory remarks so that people laugh at you and pat them on the back for their so-called joke? This is a clear sign of fakery. It’s not something you need in your life.
#10 They’re critical of everything you do. A fake friend doesn’t want you to shine because then it’s not about them. If they’re always criticizing what you wear, what you do, what you try and work towards, question why! Then, pull yourself away from the situation.
It can be upsetting to realize that someone you thought was a friend is actually fake. This is not something you should feel bad about. You simply opened yourself up to a new friendships. You had genuine intentions at heart. But, you can’t be blamed because the other person didn’t see it the same way.
Some people are simply manipulative and use others to benefit themselves. You don’t need this in your life.
If you’re nodding your head at some of the signs above *more than one*, start distancing yourself from the friendship. Of course, you could have a conversation with the person in question and explain how you feel, but if this person really is fake, they’re not going to take kindly to being accused of such.
From there, you only have one real option, surround yourself with the people who truly care about you and cut the fake ones out of your life for good.
Learning how to tell if your friend is fake can be a painful process. It’s not pleasant to find out that someone in your life isn’t as genuine as you thought they were.