It is no secret that guys tend to like what they can’t have. So, learning how to tease a guy is a great way to get him to try harder.
If you have read any of my other advice on LovePanky, you would know that I am completely against playing games when it comes to dating. I find it to be juvenile and not successful. So, why am I talking about how to tease a guy?
In my book, teasing is not a game, but an incentive. It is a way to make guys realize what they really want faster. Otherwise, you’ll be waiting around for him to realize it and by the time he does, you will have moved onto greener pastures.
In order to get a guy’s attention, sometimes being straightforward just doesn’t work. Many guys, even the decent ones, are conditioned to want what they can’t have. So learning how to tease a guy is a wonderful way to get his undivided attention.
The art of learning how to tease a guy
Teasing a guy sounds simple enough, right? Well, it is a bit more complicated than what you may have done to your grade school crush. Teasing a guy in terms of dating him is not about poking fun at his shortcomings.
In fact, learning how to tease a guy is a subtle art. It is about give and take. You want to offer something to him and pull it back. It is about mystery and small glimpses.
Let’s use lingerie as an example. There is a reason it is so popular. It is all about teasing. It is sexy because it doesn’t give everything away at once. It hints at what’s beneath but still leaves you guessing.
This is how a lot of attraction works. Think about your favorite show. If it ends with a cliffhanger, that is a form of teasing. Even a trailer for a movie is called a teaser for a reason. It gives you just enough to want more.
That is how you have to think about teasing a guy.
The benefits of learning how to tease a guy
Now that you get the idea about what teasing a guy really is, why would you do it? Well, as I said, guys don’t always know what they want.
Sometimes we need to take the lead and show them. But, again rather than walking up to your crush and saying you’re interested and hoping that ignites their feelings, subtlety can actually speak even louder.
Teasing is like a slow burn. You have to have patience, and it forces him to build up a longing that makes the end of the teasing even better.
You can tease him sexually or emotionally, and it will trigger something in him that wants to know more. Although not every guy is built the same, learning how to tease a guy can enhance your connection from when you first see a guy.
Teasing shows that you have wildly enhanced self-control. It shows that you are in control. It tells a guy that there is a lot more to you below the surface, and it makes him want to discover what that is.
And teasing is not just about sex or playing hard to get. Learning how to tease a guy lets you guide the story.
How to tease a guy the right way
Hopefully, you are now convinced that learning how to tease a guy can benefit you in more ways than one. But, how do you do it?
It isn’t like learning how to put together Ikea furniture. There isn’t a map to success or list of instructions. Rather, you learn how to tease a guy through trial and error.
#1 Practice. Just like nearly everything else in life, practice makes perfect. If you are nervous about teasing a guy you actually like, try it out on strangers. Don’t tease a guy friend, but someone you just met at the bar.
This lets you start with a blank slate. It also prevents the chances of things getting complicated as you just met. You can see what works for you and what doesn’t. Is being touchy and playful your thing or are you more shy and mysterious?
Is your teasing going to come from body language and eye contact or your words and banter? Trying different teasing styles on strangers will help you find out what works and what doesn’t, before you try it with a guy you really like.
#2 Take advantage of technology. If you are just trying to tease a guy for the first time, you may feel a little awkward or uncomfortable. So, try it over text or social media before doing it in person. Something as simple as a winking emoji can show interest without giving away too much.
You can be subtle with this or even responding to his text late and saying you just got out of the shower lets his mind wander without you actually saying anything sexual.
#3 Start up a competition. Competition has a way of raising the adrenaline and chemistry in all of us. So whether you tease a guy at the bar by daring him to shotgun a beer or claiming you can name more actors on Game Of Thrones than him ignites a spark.
Friendly competition is sort of the adult equivalent to telling your childhood crush he has cooties.
#4 Flirt and pull back. This is probably the easiest way to tease a guy to get him interested. Flirt as you normally would, but pull back. I am not saying to be hot and cold or to randomly ghost him, but just hint at your interest so that he isn’t quite sure how you feel.
This mystery may seem confusing, but it challenges him to want to find out more.
#5 Talk about sex. Just bringing up sex around him is teasing. Bring up a sex scene on that HBO show you both watch. Talk about something you read in Cosmopolitan. Make sure not to talk about sex with an ex or anything too clinical. Just mentioning anything revolving the topic will get his motors running.
#6 Use your body. Body language is a key piece of flirting and teasing. Avoid kissing or anything too obvious. Just place your hand on his arm when he’s talking or playfully hit him when you laugh at his joke.
Even your clothes can be a method of learning how to tease a guy. Instead of going all out with the sexy attire, show off your best asset. Drawing attention to just one part is sexier and focused.
#7 Don’t push it too far. Teasing is an art that means it can be overdone easily and why I told you to practice. You don’t want to tease a guy until he is so confused he moves on or goes nuts.
Teasing should be subtle. It is just enough interest to get him excited but not so much he is 100% sure you’re interested. And once he makes his intentions known, let it go. Once you’ve kissed or made it to your intended target, teasing is off the table.
Sure, you can still sexually tease someone you’re dating, but once they know you’re interested in them for sure, teasing just becomes immature.
#8 Be confident. Teasing and flirting in general really doesn’t work without a level of confidence. Know you are worth his effort and believe that you are worth his time.
If you second guess yourself, so will he. Own who you are and exude that attitude to make teasing a guy work for you.
Learning how to tease a guy in order to get him to try harder is not as easy as it sounds. But, once you master it, the guys will be falling over themselves for you.