Sociopaths don’t wear a beware sign, but they rob you of your self-esteem if you let them. If you are dating a sociopath, run and run quick.
We have all sat in a movie theater and watched the naked girl hear a noise and rush outside in the dead of the night. We all think to ourselves, what the hell are you doing, do you have no common sense? We often define a sociopath as someone lurking outside, ready to pounce. We assume a sociopath is an anomaly, and not someone we could ever know in real life, right? And worst of all, most of us would never assume that we might be dating a sociopath without even realizing it.
The truth is, a sociopath is not so ominous. In fact, some sociopaths we deal with on a daily basis function just fine out in society. They hold a job, have friends, and show no signs of the lacking social skills lurking behind their exterior. A sociopath does not wear a badge proclaiming BEWARE, nor do they all behave in a manner making you run in terror.
What is a sociopath?
The true meaning of a sociopath is someone who lacks a conscience. Now, if I were a cynic, which I am not, often that definition describes any man I have met. It takes more than just the lack of conscience to be a true sociopath. These individuals manipulate, use, and discard people as if they are nothing more than a means to an end.
Sociopath is not just a phrase to throw around, because they are someone with an official diagnosis. They possess a personality disorder characterized by an anti-social pattern of behaviors lacking regard for the feelings of others. Seemingly unaware of how their actions disrupt, hurt, or affect the lives of those they touch. Their primary focus zeros in on what they want and how to get it.
Now, if you think any guy or girl who disregards the way you feel, uses you to get what they want, or basically could care less about what they do is a sociopath, that is simply not the case. Sure, they are assholes, but a sociopath takes things to a new level and leaves anyone who loves them, or thinks they love them, wishing they never laid eyes on them.
Are you dating a sociopath? 8 signs you probably are!
As hard as it may seem to recognize a sociopath, all it takes is a good look from a new perspective. Take a look at these 8 signs you’re dating a sociopath and ask yourself if you see any of these signs in your partner.
#1 They have an oversized sense of ego. The sociopath thinks more of themselves than anyone should. Having an inflated sense of ego is an understatement. The only one who exists in a sociopath’s world is them. Not only does the sun rise and set for them, but they do no wrong. If something doesn’t go as planned, it is never the sociopath’s fault. There is a long list of characters at fault for their misdeeds.
After all, they are perfect.
#2 They have no empathy. A sociopath feels nothing, well, nothing beyond their own interests, that is. When the worst thing in the world happens to you, it isn’t their problem. They only care about themselves. If it doesn’t affect them, it makes no difference in their world. The ability to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes remains foreign to them. It doesn’t even make sense.
#3 They don’t ever get riled up even when there is a cause. A sociopath does not have the ability to overreact or react to anything. If something makes your blood turn cold, sends you into a state of overwhelm, or something you just can’t seem to handle, you may find that they treat it like it is no big deal. They are seemingly unfazed; this character flaw can’t be fixed.
#4 They prefer to go solo. When dating, it is not unusual for your date to give up time in their schedule for you. However, if they give up nothing because there was nothing to give up, that is a red flag. A sociopath doesn’t ever form close relationships or bonds. Think about it. By the time you meet someone and are seriously dating them, shouldn’t they at least have a friend or two to introduce you to? If they don’t, you should really think hard about that.
#5 They can charm the pants off of the waitress but aren’t interested in doing anything for you. Sociopaths need constant attention. Okay, who doesn’t? The difference, they need it from total strangers. How many people work for the adoration of someone they likely never see or meet again? A sociopath does.
If you notice your significant other spends the entire evening schmoozing someone they barely know, but can’t be bothered when you wave a flag trying to do anything to get their attention, that’s something you need to think about.
#6 Guided by pleasure. If you are with someone who does anything, and I mean anything, for pleasure, watch out. Sure, we all want to feel good, but there are steps and things in the way to pleasure. For the sociopath, nothing stands in the way between them and their ultimate goal… feeling good. If the only time they pay attention to you and stick around you is when you satisfy their needs, or make them feel good, watch out! You are probably engaging with a sociopath.
#7 Rules are for everyone else. We all know the person for whom rules don’t apply. At some point during adulthood, a spoiled brat learns the rules everyone needs to follow to be a part of society. A sociopath never learns that lesson. They do what they need to gain pleasure, but that remains about all that puts them into place or keeps them in line. If you notice that they live by one set of rules, and another for the rest of us living on earth, you may be dealing with a sociopath.
#8 Crazy eyes. Have you ever gotten into an argument with someone and something behind their eyes switches? Okay, guys, watch out for this one. Within every person lies the crazy eyes, but if you date someone who doesn’t need much to make their eyes disconnect with what is going on in the situation, then it may be the case that you are dating a sociopath. What does this mean exactly?
Say, you’re dating a girl, and you got her crazy pissed. Her eyes switch as she is yelling at you. Definitely disturbing. Sociopathic? Not really. But if you look at her and suddenly, you’re looking at someone you no longer recognize because her eyes have a gleam of manic in them, you may be dealing with a sociopath. The eyes are undoubtedly the window to the soul. If something in them changes with a fervor or frequency you don’t understand, their brains guide this telling sign.
A sociopath is not far off from a narcissist. In fact, the line becomes difficult to draw, but in either case, if your relationship is toxic, makes you feel second best, or you get the impression you need not be there for things to go on and progress as needed, it is probably time for your exit to happen because you are dating a sociopath.
If you fall in love with someone who seems incapable of loving you back, there are millions of people in the world and someone out there will love you as you deserve. It’s just not worth dating a sociopath, and if you do find these signs in your partner, run the other way!